the timeline for what happened next is a little muddy.
and it wasn’t a secret. people told me how stupid my hair was, but
once i lost the mullet, people started to treat me differently. girls started to notice me. i met
it didn’t last long. maybe a few month. it felt longer, though.
we talked a lot on the phone, but never about anything special. we’d talk about how attractive her friends were. she also had a really cute cousin that was a year younger.
amanda was the first time
i wish i was making that one up.
i think this problem stems from a lack of confidence in my physical appearance. i’ve never felt like i had a lot to offer a partner, so when someone i deem more attractive that me shows interest, it fucks with my head.
when ninth grade started,
my next girlfriend experience was over a year later.